This month we’re featuring a guest contributor. He prefers to subsist under the radar, but he has a way with the words and with the advice. So now…heeeeeere’s Shlomo!

Dear Shlomo,I’m getting kind of frustrated with one of my friends. Lately she’s been giving me a lot of unsolicited advice about my personal affairs, such as raising my weight. When I (reluctantly) admit that I want to watch what I’m eating, she says “oh you’re playing diet.” Ironically if I lose weight, she says, “wow you look almost…gaunt.” How do I keep this nosy friend out of my gastronomical affairs?

Weight and Mate Watching

Dear WaMW,
I was known as Shlomo, but now I go by “Lucky Kharms.” Please make a note of it.
You could admit that you love having your friend nose around your affairs. There, was that so hard? A little low-intensity kvetch here and counter-kvetch. there. Drama without the drama, and the minor-league poking and sniping reaffirms your intimate terms and mutual support. Am I right or am I right? You’ve got a good thing going with this gal. Simply let it flower and you two will be Pigeon Sisters-lovely at least until the ice-caps melt.

Shlom–, er, Lucky